single minded determination, fix my back. Fixing my back will by my sole serious goal until i accomplish it.
About a week ago now, I woke up unable to stand without excruciating pain. I mean like, going to puke pain. It was unreal, i've done "can't move" pain before, where when you're still, life is good, and if you move you're like, "OMG going to die!". But this was different, it's like someone poured burning acid down all the nerves in my right leg and sat to laugh at me. Intense.
Something is wrong with my right leg/butt/low back. This time around the pain is distinctly from the butt down. Massage seems to help some, ice is good to dull the pain. Steroids and Vicadin and some anti inflammatory pills, pretty much just put me to sleep, but have no noticeable effects. This debilitation cost me to the closer for GSSA this year, which I'm hopping is the last straw. I really feel like there is no excuse that should keep me from working every day to fix my back. Until this is better, nothing else in my life will ever for sure go smoothly.
A week later I am finally able to walk around and starting to feel some relief. I saw my chiro today since I just got back to town, and he agrees that the problem this time seems to be more muscle pinching nerves than bone. So monthly or bi-monthly massage for me, lots of PT and working on my weight is my plan. This will be my record of success. It's now or never, life is just going to keep on running, and I want to be able to keep up.
